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It might be "skunky" but it still sells
July 3, 2004
Author: Bruce Holloway
IT'S NOT one of my favourites, but hardly a year goes by that I don't find myself drinking an Export Gold. Usually it's due to "urban beer terrorism", mind you, whereby venues such as Stalag Eden Park force us punters to drink stuff we otherwise wouldn't go near, by refusing access to anything resembling choice. But fair play to Export Gold, our quintessential flatmates beer. Last month, it was named winner of the lager category (class definitions basically required entries to be gassy with hardly any flavour) at the New Zealand Beer Awards.
You could hardly blame DB for trumpeting in a press release that "Export Gold proved it has the consistent quality and `drinkability' to win the coveted `Best in Class' title". Further, Export Gold has a proud history. In 1960 then called DB Export it won a gold medal at the Brewing Exhibition "Brewex" (more recently known as the UK International Brewing Awards).
At the same awards eight years later, Export won the Brewers Guardian Challenge Cup, and was a gold medal winner again in 1983 and 1994. Brand manager Vicki Bohlbro, cites the beer's "popular and refreshing taste as its point of difference and key to success". "Since its introduction, Export Gold has been strongly associated with the Kiwi way of life, and you'll often find it the lager of choice whether you're in a bar, at a party, or enjoying a quiet beer at a BBQ... in fact for almost 50 years this refreshing lager has been satisfying a wide cross-section of palates."
And Export Gold is a big seller. In the quarter to April 18 it was the fourth highest-selling beer in grocery outlets in New Zealand, trailing only Speight's Gold Medal Ale, Lion Red and Tui, according to AC Nielsen Scan Data. I've found from "bitter" experience that the fastest way to annoy somebody is to make unkind remarks about their choice of beer. But just to balance the ledger, here is a potpourri of (overseas) comments from reviews of Export Gold on the excellent www.ratebeer.com website:
* "Another Kiwi drainpour. Export Gold? What the hell does that mean? If a country exports such a valuable commodity should it not be good? I think that there must have been some really bad beers brewed in 1968, 1983 and 1994."
* "Export Gold has a rusty metallic smell and foamy head. It tastes a bit metallic and reminds me of putting 9V batteries on my tongue when I was little. That said, it is still very refreshing and drinkable on a hot day."
* "We know Kiwi's have some of the best water in the world, but it would be better if the beer didn't have so much in it. Drink it fast and forget it."
* "Pretty weak in the flavour department. Given that it won awards, I'd hate to have been on the judging committee."
* Does not smell good, lots of adjuncts, some sweetness. Flavour is absolutely terrible, literally tastes like corn juice."
* "A weak grassy, if not skunky aroma. Standard straw lager appearance. Watery mouthful. Not too much in it. Quite a dry aftertaste."
* "Sweetish sulfury aroma, hint of hay. Empty palate. Weird bitter finish. Almost no malt at all. Somewhat buttery finish begins to develop the only character it has."
* "A cream feel up front, which soon thins out to a metallic watery repulsiveness."
* "One of the poorer examples of a cheap, nasty lager."
* "Hey this is not bad if a bit bland. Maybe an okay session beer. I really did like the sweetness and cleanness."
* "If it's cold, it hides enough of the corn taste."
* "A thin white head. Doesn't really smell like anything but water. I don't know if they actually used malt in this beer, but if they did, I can't taste it. Basically tonic water."
* "Sweetish at the beginning but then no taste at all."
* "Smells like old shoes on the bottom of a mildewy canoe."
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